Theme by nostrich.
Alone and Unbearable
I have finally started a new road… a new path… a new life for myself now that I have enter college, but I feel like everything is still the same. Everyone in my life is slowly falling apart, I miss the life I use to live… the friends I could rely on… the happiness I’ve spent with them. Everything is so different and the change is too overwhelming. I can’t be the same person whom I was. I miss you, the person who I could trust… the person whom I could go to when I feel sad… the person whom I loved. Why do you have to be so far? I try so hard to find new friends to talk to, new companions to be with, but everything I’ve been through does not feel right. The feeling of being alone is something I have not felt in a long time, but remembering this feeling has been a huge toll in my life. I know I haven’t posted in a while and it is because I’ve been busy with life, I don’t know how frequently I will be posting from this point on. But I hope you have enjoyed my post this far.
-I always have you <3
Why do I become a brother?
From the day I met you to no more than a week, I become a brother to you. How did I ever get the tittle? All i wanted to do is make you happy, be their for you. I wanted to treasure the time I am with you, and be there whenever you are sad. When I start to like you… you push me away as an option and just call me a brother. Every time you talk about this boyfriend of yours, I am always in pain. I have to hid my own feeling for you, I am hurting myself trying to do this; however, I just hope for the best for you. But the question is: how did I become a “brother”? How did I earn a tittle like this? All i am doing is making sure you are okay. I treat you as if you are the only one, if you are the only one for me… but you think that all this treatment is because i’m just a normal person that cares for you. I know i may not be straight forward, but it is because I care for your thoughts, i never want to lose the thing we have. I just want to improve what we have now, but it feels impossible because our feeling are not the same. Being a “brother” for you is not bad, but I wish you could think of me more. Even if i try to move on, I can never let go of you. You are always in my thoughts, my life, and in my heart. You are something i can never lose sight of, if you can give me one chance… would you? Can we start something new, live life as if we were in a friend zone or in a “brother/sister” relationship. Can we live life if we were actually boyfriend and girlfriend because I want to show you, that you are truly a great person and that you know it. Going out with jerks are one thing, but do they really care for you? Do they really know whats best for you? Sometimes a nice guy is a great thing, and I wish you knew that because I want to be more than just your “brother”
-I always have you
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About me
This might be one my last post this year… or even more. I just want to say for anyone that seen these post. I have had been through many issues and pain in my life. But I think now, I have done something I wish I never had done. I think that my life, is like a roller coaster that never ends. I think I need to rethink of who I really am, from what I am trying to hide, cover, enshroud of me. But thank you for all those that were following me. I’ll keep this simple in short… But thank you, and I do not know if I will be talking to you anytime soon, because it pains to think of you… and even talk to you because of the hardship. Hardship I’ve been bearing since i was a kid, hardship that I have been bearing since I met you, and the burden I’ve been carrying on my back. I’ll always think of you, but I just need some time alone. <3
Promise and Sorries
I just want to say, I’m sorry for all the things I have done to you to have hurt you. When we met I had only promised you one thing that would last a life time, “To never make you sad, and always see a smile on your face”. I always wanted to uphold that promise; however, If I have ever made you cry or ever disappointed from the time we met, then I wonder if I can really do what I had promised you. All I cared for, thought about, and wanted was your happiness. Your happiness and smile is the one and only thing I looked for in my day and helped me through the thick and thin. Why do we keep promises we can never accomplish? Why is it that if we promise someone something that we set out to do, we can never follow through it and end up hurting the person you promised? I always made promises and kept them to the word, but I never once tried to break any on purpose. Without you my life would just be incomplete, and I always wanted to let you know that you are never alone. I’ll always be by your side, if you can forgive me for what I have done to make you sad: give me another chance. I don’t ever want to do that again.
-I Always Have You<3
rawrlikeyouloveme asked: Awwww, thanks. "D <3 Haha. Your reply made me smile.
No problem <3 :D
I started as one and then i met you. Together we both go through a journey; that journey leads us two different ways or paths. Though we go our separate ways i can never forget about you. In the end no matter how I think about it, You are always the one i think of as my queen… my love. Someone I can never forget or will ever forget because i truly want you and always miss you
-I Always have you <3
Truth
Sometimes…The truth hurts. The need that we, as people, try to delay the reality and cushion the blow. One time or another, we will all soon figure out what is true and what is false, the question is why not tell us now? why not tell us before things get worse? or why not tell us instead of letting it build up and we have to learn it the hard way and never wish it was true? But the reality… the truth is no one likes the truth. Even though it may come as a shocker to many, the truth can be very painful. The idea that you can cling onto something until the very last moment, yet you know it is not true… you know that it will never happen. Why is it that we must hear it to move on… to go past and better ourselves. Life is ever changing and it is that truth that will make stronger… to make us a better person… to help us accept that reality is harsh and life is never the way it seems. Yet I… I see the truth as something i know will never happen no matter what you say. I know that the truth will hurt me and that even if i accept the false reality that everything will come back to haunt me. Truth is reality… and the truth hurts. We must learn to accept this fact and be able to move on from where we are and learn to live with how they have been presented. No cushion… no words to make the “pain” easier, because in the end result it will just lead up to the same truth that we never wanted to hear
-I always have you <3
Living life to the fullest
When something knocks you down, most people just get back up… but what happens that one thing, puts you out of your misery…your life…your time. What many people do not learn is that death is just right around the corner. To accept the truth is inevitable ‘till it happens and you are given a second chance. No matter what you do, you must never regret the decision you make, the path you take, and the life you choose. Though things should not be done in a rush, just take the life you have and find a way to live it like its no other. Days that you will be able to treasure and remember and never forget instead of regret. Its just that life can be a butthole, but we all know that sometimes things happen for a reason, the only problem is we never know what that reason is. We search all our lives for that reason and when it hits us we just can not believe it. In the end we ponder the thought of why that has ever happen. Just think about this, Have you ever regrette something you have fun to the point where you do not feel like your self? Ever wanted to do more, but you couldn’t? or May it even be that Life has been too short that the things you wanted to do never came? Well here is my suggestion… Take the opportunity you can and expand from it only from there you will truly know how you want to live your life. Never stay in the back always look up and move forward.
Hate
What a powerful thing… the idea of anger and dislike towards one thing. Why do people create such angst and anger that would create this. Here is just my little rant about it; Hate is such a great thing and sad. It is what makes us human and prevents us from having our own perfect little world. In our lives, it is impossible to expel hate from our emotion only suppress it. Hate is what sometimes forms by liar, the idea that being trustful and truthful hurts one another. Hate comes from many places and position and it starts from the heart. Sometimes wishing that this was not create, maybe someday people are able to forgive one another and truly forget the things that have happen. Hate… the bottle up emotion of darkness…the emotion of the devil. I just wanted to say this because i live in a world of hate, i really do not like it but i must live through it. Life is never fair and we must always tough things out but in all reality all you can trust are very so little people. I know this may sound like a downer but i just needed to get this out of my system. I am a person that can’t bare this, yet ironically i live in it. Everyday and every waking moment i barely can get past this and i just hope one day i can live through it and brush it off like its nothing. Thank you
A Blank day
Everytime i talk to you, my life feels like its at a standstill. When everything sad or happy goes away and all i want is you. The time we spent together and the time we talked together has been the best. It is a time when i can forget about everything that is happening around me. I wish times like these are always like this. I never want to ever think about the tragic days that we face and the deep burden that we must beer. A time and day when everything is almost like it is “blank”. A start of a new day and a new happiness. A day that the only thing i need to worry about is to make you happy. I always wish that these times could come more apparent. I never want to leave your side because you are truly the only one for me. To hold you in my arms and embrace you with my love. Those are the only days i want to live. Why is it that we must bear these painful times? the deep burden? Why does it have to be that we have to be troubled with so many things? I only wish that everyone will find their special someone. Someone that could make them forget about all the troubles and remain happy with the time they are with them. You are always someone I will have in my heart no matter where you are and where you go. And never forget that the times spent with you will always be the best moments of my life through any circumstance. -I Always Have you <3
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